Ides of March

“Beware the Ides of March” said the seer.

“Yea, whatever!” say I—why? Because I had a fucking beautiful day, that’s why: I've lost 2 more pounds. I wore a pink shirt, tucked in, that I havne't been able to wear in a year; I was productive at work; I ate really yummy and healthy food; I drank all my water; I had a great workout, and I finally heard back from the last of my missing. 2 out of 3 were positive…and 2 out of 3 ain’t bad, my friendly friends! Not bad a’tall. That makes me a happy girl and, just as an aside, I find it terrifically funny that the negative response was from a man. The ladies were rational adults—the guy was a drama queen. *hmm* Imagine that!

Sorry, guys...don't mean to pick on you, but you deserve it sometimes! ;)

Yep, havin’ a great day…until about an hour ago when Mel knocked on my bedroom door and asked me what I was doing. I was watching a movie in the background while I caught up on my internet newspaper reading since LOST is a re-run AGAIN! Anyway, apparently she believed that me using my laptop with the door shut gave her an opening to ask me, yet again, if I was “talking” with anyone on the internet.

She means “chatting” as in trying to chat up an available female for lustful sex. Speaking of, any interested parties, email me: tracecook@sbcglobal.net ;)

MOTHER FUCKER! That’s what I really have to say to that! Did you have to start in on your insanely jealous paranoia TODAY? BLOODY TODAY!

Shit happens, I guess. Beware the Ides of March, indeed.

Oh well. It’s really impossible to get me down today, but it is NOT impossible to insult me, and she did and I told her so. For some reason that I can’t figure out, she believes that none of this is terribly hard on me just because I can speak honestly about my feelings and do positive things for myself in the face of adversity while also respecting personal boundaries and privacy. She actually had the nerve to tell me that she thinks that I don’t ask her similar questions because I don’t care.

I don’t care!?!

Yea, okay I admit it: it’s totally and utterly obvious that I don’t care one iota…just as it’s obvious that I’m just another cold-hearted dyke lookin’ for the next piece of ass to sit on my face.

Oh, I’m sorry! Was that crude?

Here are my words of wisdom for the day: don’t confuse personal integrity and inner strength with lack of care and concern. If someone is supporting you, financially, whether they are rich or not, they have much care and concern for you. Period.

So, does this mean that the roommate thing isn’t working out well? No, it doesn’t. Honestly, it’s working out A LOT better than I figured it would, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t bumps in the road and I won’t get insulted and talk about that here.

That’s what personal blogs are for, right? Hey, it’s life: shit happens!!!

I Love Myself Today
By Bif Naked

You left me like a broken doll
In pieces as I took the fall
For you, you dumb chump!
You left me free-falling like space junk
Burning up in the atmosphere of life

Well I sound like a philosopher
but I'm a fool who's off her rocker
'Cause I let you in my heart that one last time

I've had enough, made up my mind
I'm gonna get up and out and wild!

I love myself today
Not like yesterday
I'm cool, I'm calm
I'm gonna be okay! Uh huh
I love myself today
Not like yesterday
Take another look at me now
'Cause it's your last look
Your last look forever

Well look at you you're all puffed up
In that big red truck- but you're outta luck (this time)
Well, that's tough
'Cause I'm on fire- too hot to touch
With a chatroom full of lovers on the line
Gonna step right up; spit shine my soul
I'm gonna be proud and loud and outta control!

I love myself today
Not like yesterday
I'm cool, I'm calm
I'm gonna be okay! Uh huh
I love myself today
Not like yesterday
Take another look at me now
'Cause it's your last look
Your last look forever

I'm lookin' in the mirror and I like what I see:
I've lost the fear & the horror that's been eating at me
'Cause being with you is like a hangman's noose
I was living my life in dead man's shoes

I've had enough. Made up my mind
I'm gonna get up and out and wild!

I love myself today
Not like yesterday
I'm cool, I'm calm
I'm gonna be okay! Uh huh
I love myself today
Not like yesterday
Take another look at me now
'Cause it's your last look
Your last look forever!!