Saturday, February 25, 2006

I Need Some Cadillacs

So, I dreamt about soccer and sex last night--two things I've been retired from...though, I'm hoping to moonlight for a while with the latter before I come out of full retirement. ;)

I woke up to the sound of a bitterly cold, angry wind. It's scary out there and I've got a hair appointment in an hour. It's in downtown Ypsi, so I just walk. Today, not having that black Cadillac CTS-V that I saw the other day really blows. And speaking of sex, the chick driving it was uber-hot and she knew it, too--how could you not in a car like that? I was walking with my co-worker during our break when I saw her. When she drove by I said, "She's looking for me and she doesn't even know it...that's got a Corvette engine in it!"

There in lies my secret turn-on: cars. No, I don't own any of them and never have bought a new one, but ever since moving to Michigan I've found a contrary love of the automobile even as I despise them in so many ways. My all-time favorite remains the Dodge Stealth, but the new caddy's are really turning my head (I wouldn't mind a Ford Mustang these days, either).

Speaking of caddy's, in this post-Mel era of my life, I figured it was time for not only a cellphone, but also a new vibrator (gasp!) since the one I had before we shared. And I don't need a new one just for that, I need a new one because it's broken. I probably shouldn't write this here, but I'm going to: so, she tells me last week that the vibe is officially caput; she was in the middle of using it (it's had a short for a while) and it suddenly caught fire! I know I shouldn't, but I couldn't and still can't help but laugh and naughtily think, "That's what you get for using it so much."

(If you know me and you're getting bad visuals, go to another blog, pussy.)

Anyway, the reason why I'm matching vibrators with Cadillacs is because the one I have is called "The Cadillac of Vibrators." Tada! Now, honestly, I don't have a lot of experience with vibes, but I have some. I've been introduced a couple of different ones through my handful of sex-partners, but a few years ago when I found myself suddenly single, again, I went shopping for my own, and that's the one I chose. It's quiet and reliable, and lasted a good 4 years, so that's the one I chose again.

Hopefully it'll be here soon--not only do I need some Cadillac, but I've got a minor arm injury from over-extending during my kick-boxing workout. The nice thing about the caddy is that it's a great stand-in for all sorts of occasions.

So, since I have access to a GM discount, when I decide it's time to go car shopping (EVIL), I'm going to check out the pricing of leasing a Cadillac CTS. I only need it for back and forth to work, and running around town--everything else I can take the train. So, if I can afford it now that I'm only supporting myself and my student loans will be paid off next year (and then I'll be rich!), I think I might just get myself a caddy...because I can see myself in that car and I can see a fine lady in the seat next to me, too.

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